Controversy over roadside memorial in Lone Grove

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Posted: 9:54 PM Oct 9, 2008
Last Updated: 12:11 PM Oct 10, 2008
Reporter: KXII Staff
Email Address: firstnews@kxii.com

108 comments

Poll

A | A | A

LONE GROVE, Okla -- What was meant to be a peaceful tribute to a former Lone Grove student is now a source of controversy in the town.

Do you agree with the City of Lone Grove removing the memorial at Prairie Valley and Meridian Road?

I agree

I disagree

A memorial at Meridian and Prairie Valley in Lone Grove stands at the place where Zach Smith was killed in August.

The Lone Grove student was reportedly riding with friends when he got out of the car while playing a game, and was hit.

After Smith's death, a cross was placed near the feeder road. Since that time, the memorial has grown to include solar powered lights, stuffed animals, crosses, footballs, and a rock barrier.

City officials say the memorial has become a distraction, even a safety hazard to other drivers.

Friends of the victim don't see it that way.

"It's important because number one none of these kids have ever lost anyone, especially a best friend or a classmate, and Zach was just loved by everybody, all of those kids loved and adored him. He got along with everybody," said Kelly Pletch, a friend of Smith's.

City Manager Marianne Elfert refused to speak on camera, but tells us the memorial is on city property. Family and friends are welcome to keep a cross at the site, but the other items will be removed by city workers.

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Comments are posted from viewers like you and do not always reflect the views of this station.

Posted by: Johnny Lawman Location: U.S. Capital on Nov 16, 2008 at 05:57 PM
I think the city need to follow state law and remove the memorial from their property. To many rubber neckers have been in wrecks and run over innocent people because of such thing. Clean up the litter. Keep oklahoma green not trashed out.

Posted by: courtney oller Location: Lone Grove on Oct 18, 2008 at 11:39 AM
I never knew Zack, but I personally think and believe that the memorial might help those people who run that stop sign, maybe some of these people will actually stop and see what happens, how they should drive. If people see it then maybe they'll actually stop at the stop signs!!!

Posted by: Anonymous on Oct 16, 2008 at 11:43 AM
It looks tacky.

Posted by: Opinionated Location: Ardmore on Oct 16, 2008 at 11:42 AM
The city should look at the safety of it's citizens first and foremost. It is a distraction and hazzard. It should be removed. Give them to the end of next month, then if it is still there, then the city should remove it.

Posted by: B. T. Location: Lone Grove on Oct 16, 2008 at 10:53 AM
I suggest that the "City Officials" back up, take a breath, and give this situation some space. A little compassion, understanding and some patience will go a long way during this period of grieving. Legalism might be better served to take a back seat on this one.

Posted by: forever Location: sherman on Oct 15, 2008 at 08:28 AM
There is a cross memorial at Skaggs and hwy 82- in Sherman,Tx-a young man died there some twenty years ago..His family keeps this large corner mowed and clean..If you want a memorial -are you ready to take care of it for the rest of your life. Just think- this family has done this for TWENTY YEARS. At first it did have more than a cross. But this cross sits back off the road about 100 -150 feet. So ask yourself-in 6 months do you want people to drive by and think__?__.Doesn't anyone care? You may say you will take care of it- but when it's cold or hot and you have other things to do - will it come first or last?--As I said ' this family has taken very good care( best maintained area around)for twenty years. Greave the way you need-but keep in mind it's his name people will see- not yours. as

Posted by: WILSON Location: OKLAHOMA on Oct 15, 2008 at 12:47 AM
FOR THE FRIENDS AND FAMILY SO SORRY TO HEAR ABOUT THIS ACCIDENT.WHY CAN"T PEOPLE LET THIS FAMILY AND FRIENDS TO GRIEVE FOR THEIR FRIEND ALONE.THIS IS PART OF THE WAYS KIDS CAN DEAL WITH THIS TRAGIC ACCIDENT AND HELP EACH OTHER GET THROUGH EACH DAY.IF THE FAMILY AND FRIENDS ARE KEEPING THE AREA CLEAN WHAT IS THE PROBLEM?THE CITY NEEDS TO PAY THE FAMILY FOR KEEPING THE AREA CLEAN AND MOWED. THE AREA ,IT IS THE NICEST ,CLEANEST,AND PRECIOUS SITE IN LONE GROVE.GOD BLESS YOU ALL AND DOUBLE BLESS YOU PEOPLE WHO CRITIZE THE SITE BECAUSE GOD ALWAYS CAN MAKE YOU PAY FOR THE HURTFUL THINGS YOU SAY.HAVE A BLESSED DAY.

Posted by: Aunt B Location: Anywhere on Oct 14, 2008 at 06:28 PM
Well it looks like the City Manager has never lost anyone maybe she should so she will know how it feels to loose someone you love. It seems that ever since this City Manager has taken over they make news quite often she needs to get a life. Lone Grove use to be a respectful town to go to but not now since she took over.

Posted by: JB Location: Shertown on Oct 14, 2008 at 11:25 AM
By looking at the picture and watching the video, this Memorial site is very busy, I didn't realize 15 year old boys liked stuffed animals. I am sorry Lone Grove but a cross with lights is sufficient. You have taken your need to be at a memorial site and bring something to be apart of his death too far. I am sure his family appreciates the memorial, but slow down on the clutter. A plaque or a beautiful cross would be just as much of a memorial as all the many, many, many things you have there. Sorry, but I have to agree with your City Manager.

Posted by: Anonymous on Oct 14, 2008 at 07:58 AM
Dear Sandra, So sorry to hear about your son. Prayers and thoughts are with you. TX

Posted by: Opinionated Location: Ardmore on Oct 14, 2008 at 05:39 AM
The point is, this "Memorial" is a danger to the community. It is a distraction, and people jumping out of their vehicles are liable to be hit by oncomeing traffic. I personally do not see a need to place a "Memorial" to someone where they died. The state doesn't allow such things, neither should the city.

Posted by: Oz Location: Denison on Oct 14, 2008 at 12:45 AM
Prayers to the family, but this memorial is an eyesore. It looks cluttered. Just think if a memorial was allowed for everyone that was killed on the highway it would get to be a little much. Especially at the sites where there are multiple wrecks. It's been up since August, time to let go.

Posted by: Outsider able to see the forest Location: Oklahoma on Oct 13, 2008 at 09:30 AM
How does it make sense to have a "memorial" where kids or adults can pass by and be reminded of how tragically this boy died. Why not a tribute to his life? Seriously. Quit living in the past. It isn't going to help anyone. Start a Memorial Scholarship fund - something in a more positive "looking to the future" and getting past the pain-thing.

Posted by: Anonymous on Oct 13, 2008 at 08:58 AM
Did this person not get a site at the graveyard? Take your flowers and things there like most people. I don't mind people putting down crosses or wreaths on the road for a couple weeks but this is going overboard. If you want to help these kids cope teach them to celebrate someone's life not dwell on where it ended.

Posted by: Sandra Location: Sherman on Oct 13, 2008 at 08:11 AM
I lost a son in a terrible car wreck a few years ago. There was no memorial put there, because, I think, all those who loved him do not need a reminder where he was killed. Each time, I come to that place, my heart hurts.A memorial would not help, and could cause someone else to have an accident there.

Posted by: Bill Location: Ardmore on Oct 12, 2008 at 11:27 PM
I've never understood the whole "accident site" memorial thing. I've never ONCE heard of a family going there for comfort. Those sites just seem to be painful reminders of a tragic event. Why not put these items at the person's grave site or offer to do something for the families?

Posted by: Anonymous Location: Ardmore on Oct 12, 2008 at 10:06 PM
My heart goes out to the family and friends of this young man...But, I have lost several members of my own family and I dont believe in worshiping the place they died. Their souls are in Heaven, not at the memorial. Having so many things at the sight of an accident is hidious....Leave a cross and a few things, but dont make it a place of worship where others may have a accident...Let him rest in peace and quit blaming the city manager for doing her job...and for all the young students saying she needs to grow up well, they are the ones that will eventually grow up and realize....LIFE isnt forever....

Posted by: cg Location: lone grove on Oct 12, 2008 at 05:30 PM
i whole-heartedly agree with "Anonymous" - it is time for the removal of this woman!!! come on citizens of lone grove - time to talk to the city council men and women and get Marianne Elfert GONE!!!! we need someone who will listen to the citizens who pay taxes that pay the salary of that position.

Posted by: Natalie Smith Location: LG on Oct 12, 2008 at 02:57 PM
Soo Happy That The Memorial Gets To Stand As It Is. God Is Awesome To Us! =)

Posted by: Jessica Smith Location: Ardmore on Oct 12, 2008 at 01:33 PM
Zachery was an AMAZING friend to us. He meant EVERYTHING to me. Our memorial is to make us remember how amazing he was and just smile at it. NOT to get attention or to cause distraction. It has became a part of our daily lives passing by it and knowing we will see him again. Thanks for everyone who supported us in our little controversy.

Posted by: cjc Location: lg on Oct 12, 2008 at 10:51 AM
I agree with this last comment!! I have personally had to deal with the city manager and her ruthless decisions she makes without reguard to our town. All involved with placing this memorial should write in to every paper and news station and let their voices be heard! If not, what's up her sleave next?? Several months ago, she suggested no artificial flowers could be placed on the graves of Lone Grove cemetary due to cattle injesting the plastic. Her land is north of the cemetary and Guess What??? She has cattle and horses! It would only have benefitted her! Probably the same with the memorial. It is just East of her land!

Posted by: Memaw Location: Madill on Oct 12, 2008 at 09:02 AM
I too lost a young Grand daughter in a horrible accident...what a beautiful memorial there, indeed it was needed and glad it has been worked out. I do believe however that a cross will be sufficient in time..that being a key word here in time..it hurts so much..how fortunate to be able to have this memorial for now..unfortunately had it happened on I 35 there would have been no discussion..one this elaborate would not have been allowed period. My heart goes out to the family and friends..God Bless you with healing and strength! And Bless the City Manager for having to deal with such a controversial emotional subject..no one would have liked to have been put in a situation as this decision.

Posted by: Bo Location: Lone Grove on Oct 12, 2008 at 04:03 AM
It is about time for people to come together this sorry city manager out of office. If you take this one down dumb city manager, you have to do all of them. This is such a bad thing. Just leave the place allow city manager. You messed up on the weed spray in the water lines and covered that up and now this. whats next; no more flowers in graveyards?

Posted by: James Location: Collinsville on Oct 12, 2008 at 12:30 AM
If Im Riding my motercycle, lose control and die in your front yard all of my friends are coming over to YOUR YARD and put up whatever thay want to. Surely you wont mind mowing and weed eating around it will you? Oh and by the way my wife was on the back and my son was in the side car so I guess that will be three memorials for ya to take care of.

Posted by: Anonymous Location: LG on Oct 11, 2008 at 11:11 PM
The city manager has issues on anything that she cannot control...When the city bucked her decision on the removal of the memorial, she relented. Now would be a good time to come together and BUCK her employment before she tries another dumb stunt!!! I love how these families came together on something so important and stood up to this dictator!

Posted by: Anonymous Location: marshall county on Oct 11, 2008 at 08:00 PM
while i do feel for the family and friends of this young man, one must take into account the safety of others. am i saying to get rid of it all together? of course not that is heart-less, but perhaps to simplify it a little. people grief in different ways, a tribute/memorial is a wonderful idea, but finding comfort in ones family and friends is even greater... his life, memory, and legacy will not be forgotten just because a few things are removed.

Posted by: Anonymous on Oct 11, 2008 at 07:35 PM
KXII-Where did the comments go for this story? It says there are 73, but when you click on it there are none. I would like to read the comments of other viewers on this story.

Posted by: daddysteve on Oct 11, 2008 at 05:17 PM
the friends and family should be able to put anything that they want up for him there. if you loose some one you would want that there so if you say it dont belong there then just remember that when someone close to you dies in a wreck and you want to put thing up fo them.

Posted by: Citizen on Oct 11, 2008 at 04:18 PM
The City is right in removing this. It is a tragedy, but along side any road is not the place for a memorial. Let the family put it in their yard and friends would still come and honor their son's memory. I have never understood these memorials on the road and have always told my family that if that happens to me, please remember me where I lived and loved, not where I died. Come on people its a street not a cemetery.

Posted by: to Location: Lone Grove on Oct 11, 2008 at 11:02 AM
To PassThereEverday: You wrote, "Many times I have seen people looking at the display and roll right on through the stop sign" Many times...really? I have never seen it and I am by there everyday on my commute. Look, this memorial may not stand forever, but for now it erases some painful memories for those on the scene that night. Instead of remembering lights and sirens they see love and peace. How is that bad?

Posted by: Someone Location: somewhere on Oct 11, 2008 at 10:47 AM
Oldschool you are to harsh...........can't beleive you even think like that. Makes me sick.

Posted by: kelly on Oct 11, 2008 at 10:39 AM
seems to me like the city manager thinks of herself as the lord and master who wants total control,,or whatever..it is a control issue

Posted by: Anonymous on Oct 11, 2008 at 05:45 AM
There are more important things in this world to worry about than this, you people in Lone Grove need to get a life, leave other peoples stuff alone and stay out of their business

Posted by: Anonymous on Oct 11, 2008 at 12:56 AM
we have a national holiday called memorial day, it is to be celebrated at the cemetary for loved ones, nowhere else. get the roadside memorials off city property and let city workers do their job of city maintanence.

Posted by: mommaof3boys Location: Healdton on Oct 11, 2008 at 12:51 AM
Ok if looking at this is such a DISTraction then we should not have Road signs, Gargare sale signs, business/billboards ect..... things that you actually have to take time out to read. This is for the Family and It should Stay there is nothing about it that can cause a wreck unless the person driving is being iresponsable. Anything can cause a wreck that you have to look at but until its illegal to post garage sale signs and ect... this should be fine it way more important. THIS IS FOR THE FAMILY. IF YOUR WORRIED ABOUT TRASHYNESS MOW THE CITY GRASS, HAVE SOME ONE PICK UP THE ROAD SIDE TRASH, ASK PEOPLE TO CLEAN UP AROUND THEIR HOMES....DON'T TAKE A MEMORIAL DOWN.

Posted by: LG Alumni Location: Lone Grove on Oct 11, 2008 at 12:26 AM
People should be able to mourn their loved ones, but this has gotten a tad bit out of hand. The memorial was a labor of love, but, but I have see the memorial and have to drive past it every morning and night. It is too big for the location they placed it (even though that's where Zach's accident occurred). Perhaps the city officials and the FAMILY of the victim can come to a reasonable agreement. As for the students and friends, perhaps they should consider how the family feels. It's not only about what they want.

Posted by: A Mom Location: Ardmore on Oct 10, 2008 at 10:02 PM
This is a healing thing for this young man's family and friends. This young man's family will never get past this pain and hurt but in time they will learn to cope with the pain and function again. In the meantime.. can we please respect their need to honor and celebrate this man as they see fit? If the area is being maintained then people need to hush and understand this is something that those who loved this young man need to do to cope. A parent who has lost a child has one very big fear.. that their child will be forgotten. Help them keep his memory by being understanding of this memorial. My heart goes out to you all... I lost my son also and I truly understand the grief and pain. Ignore those who simply can not comprehend the hurt. And pray they never really do.

Posted by: Glenda, the good witch Location: LG on Oct 10, 2008 at 09:48 PM
I'm assuming, but I have to wonder...if these city street employees would have refused to follow orders from the colonel, would we be reading about their dismissal in next weeks ledger??? Remember in The Wizard for Oz where the Witch sent out those flying monkey's to do her dirty work???And finally Dorthy stood up to her and everyone lived happily ever after???Just wondering........

Posted by: PassThereEverday Location: Lone Grove on Oct 10, 2008 at 09:14 PM
It was a sad and tragic evening. And the loss is very great for so many. Yes, we want to remember him and keep his spirit alive. The memorial is a wonderful idea but the placement is not. If one wants to stop there and see the mementos or place one there, they must either stop in the road or park on private property. This has the potential to create another tragedy. Many times I have seen people looking at the display and roll right on through the stop sign.In addition to the traffic hazard there are utilities and pipe lines that run under that area. We have no way of knowing if they are close enough to the surface to cause injury to those that wish to place an item in the ground.Respect the memory of Zach and place these warm and special items with him in his resting place not at the place of the tragedy. As for the city manager, she was hired by the city council to fairly enforce the city codes to benefit the ENTIRE population of Lone Grove. It's not personal.

Posted by: A Mom Location: Texas on Oct 10, 2008 at 08:55 PM
To Git Rid Of It, Cultured, and all the folks that think the memorial is so nasty/trashy etc, I would like to ask, have you ever lost someone you loved so much in such a violent manner? 5 Years ago a 23 year old drunk took the life of my 33 year old daughter as she went to work.Her employer, and people who worked with her erected a memorial that stood for 2-3 years at the site of her death. We could drive up the Interstate and see it, and drew comfort in knowing how much she ment to so many people.We aren't lacking in culture just because we grieve, we aren't "Southern White Trashy" either. We are family, and have lost people whom we adored. The Memorial should be allowed to stay a few weeks/months, and if the City Manager, Cultured, and "Git Rid Of It" don't like the looks of it, take your sad selves on a different route. Let Zach rest in peace, allow his friends and family some respect. I will pray that none of you cruel people ever loose a loved one in such a manner.

Posted by: student at Lone Grove Location: Lone Grove High School on Oct 10, 2008 at 08:45 PM
if you haven't seen the memoriol then you and your calling it "trash" and "junk" you acan shut up cause Zach was a best friend, a classmate, and basically a brother to me and many others and he got along with every one and if you say "it's a distraction" then you should shut your mouth to cause its at a four way stop and if your not stopped or slowing down then your breaking a law and the mayor needs to grow up and put her GRANNY PANTIES ON AND GROW UP A LITTLE and thats all i have to she and the mayor is going to be voted out if they do take it down cause no one is make them look at it. Vote her out!!!!!!!!!!

Posted by: Lilnita Location: Lone Grove on Oct 10, 2008 at 08:04 PM
I believe that the memorial is not only a memorial for Zach but also for his friends and family. If one of you people from the city lost a friend or loved one, you too would be EXTREMELY upset if you were told that it had to be removed! I can't believe that in a town full of love and support as much as lone grove, that our leaders of the city would try to tear something so special down!!! It is at a 4 way stop not even in town! I drive by that memorial at least twice a day, and never once does it distract me! It reminds me that there really are true angels out there! God bless Zachs family and friends, hang in there. You're in my prayers.

Posted by: Anonymous on Oct 10, 2008 at 07:52 PM
Well ya the city wants to get it gone . so they can forget that they let one of there own get away with murder.

Posted by: Anonymous on Oct 10, 2008 at 07:19 PM
I don't live in Lone Grove & I didn't know this young man. I don't think the mayor is heartless & I disagree with the person that wrote some of us have no heart. The site isn't on private property & it isn't the site where he was buried. Leave the cross & remove the rest. The memories will never be forgotten. My prayers are with the family.

Posted by: Mickey Location: Lone Grove on Oct 10, 2008 at 07:00 PM
Another Mother, Hey, whats a GEEN ????

Posted by: oldschool Location: Lone Grove on Oct 10, 2008 at 06:54 PM
There is a Memorial at the School, and the Cemetery. It's distracting, and depressing to see that stuff at the intersection. It's been almost two months now, time to move on. If there was a Memorial at every spot a person lost their life, Well...Just imagine..

Posted by: Anonymous Location: LG on Oct 10, 2008 at 06:45 PM
Well, I guess we should all take our hats off to little ol' elfert for making her re-evaluate her mistake!!! I am sure that she feels horrable for upsetting "HER" town and we, as citizens, should all give her a BIG HUG! lol:)

Posted by: Anonymous on Oct 10, 2008 at 06:40 PM
I have no problem with a simple roadside memorial, but the problem here is when to stop adding without going too far. Best roadside memorial I've ever seen was a cross with a couple of solar-powered lights. Someone was keeping the grass cut around it. Keep a small memorial there, but what say you find an additional way to remember this young man, like a plaque at the school, a memorial scholarship to a deserving graduating senior. I know emotions are running really high on this subject, but I would hope that later on, a good compromise will be reached.

Posted by: ANOTHER MOTHER Location: LONE GROVE on Oct 10, 2008 at 05:55 PM
AS FAR AS THINGS BLOWING IN THE WIND, THEY HAVE GEEN SECURED DOWN AND THEY ARE NOT BLOWING IN THE WIND. IT WILL TAKE A CRANE TO REMOVE SOME OF THOSE STAKES AS THIS GROUND IS AS HARD AS CEMENT. TO "CULTURED" - IF THAT IS ALL YOU CAN COME UP WITH - ONE WOULD WONDER WHAT KIND OF CULTURAL BACKGROUND YOU HAVE - WHITE SOUTHERN TRASH - WHERE ARE YOU FROM - OKLAHOMA! THAT IS IN THE SOUTH! SO DOES THAT MAKE YOU SOUTHERN WHITE TRASH TOO?

Posted by: Hear the childen's voice Location: Lone Grove on Oct 10, 2008 at 05:48 PM
I hate to break the bad news, but the city manager is not voted on....She is elected by the city council. Trust me, someone has already tried to have the town vote her out!!! BUT, as I understand, it there was enough votes to take to the city council meeting, they would have to take into consideration that little o'l mrs. Elfert is not got the popular vote!! Let the people be heard. Have a town meeting, involve the high school kids who feel so strongly about this and let them prevail!

Posted by: PARENT Location: LONE GROVE on Oct 10, 2008 at 05:41 PM
JUST TO LET YOU KNOW AND TO TRY TO CALM THINGS DOWN - THE LONE GROVE CITY MANAGER HAS AGREED TO LET THE MEMORIAL STAY AS IS. PROVIDED THAT WE KEEP IT CLEANED, MOWED AND THE TRASH PICKED UP. WE HAVE AGREED TO THIS AND WAS TOLD THAT THIS MATTER WOULD NOT BE MENTIONED AGAIN. SO LET'S GET ON TO OTHER THINGS. BUT THANK YOU ALL FOR YOUR SUPPORT.

Posted by: teacher Location: Lone Grove on Oct 10, 2008 at 05:39 PM
We do have a memorial at our campus. It is located in front of the cafetorium.

Posted by: Anonymous Location: LG on Oct 10, 2008 at 05:38 PM
A town meeting needs to be held and the citizens of our youth need to be heard! As parents, we need to stand behind our children and support them by letting the city manager and the city mayor realize how important their views are....we have kids running the streets and doing drugs and God knows what else...nothing is done! We have good kids who place a memorial up for their lost friend and keep the place looking great and that gets stripped away from them like they have no voices!!! I think your suppose to stop at this area anyway, there is a stop sign!!! So what's the harm????

Posted by: Anonymous on Oct 10, 2008 at 05:33 PM
I can see it being a distraction to other traffic. If some one is looking at it and pulls out in front of another vehicle and someone else lost their life there. Its unsafe for the students to be taking care of that area. There are alot of idiots driving now a days and what if one of these students get hit and killed while cleaning this area. Lets put something in the park or another area for these kids to remember their friend.

Posted by: LG mama Location: LG on Oct 10, 2008 at 05:32 PM
Has anyone figured out yet that the city manager lives right down the street from this memorial....she does not want the "trash" blowing into her fields so that her livestock does not injest it.

Posted by: LoNe GrOvE Location: LG on Oct 10, 2008 at 05:31 PM
I am ashamed!!!Very Very Ashamed that Marianne Elfert represents our town so poorly. This little town was once a great place to live and thirve. Now with the poor leadership we have at city hall (city council included) we are a city divided. Shame on you Mrs. Elfert Shame on You

Posted by: momof2 Location: LG on Oct 10, 2008 at 05:27 PM
I think that the city of LONE GROVE will be making a HUGE mistake by changing the memorial. This very sad event is still soo fresh on so many minds, including the children of LG. This memorial is a way for all to honor, morn, and love this little boy. I pass by it everyday. And every time I do, I often say a prayer for all involved. That corner looks better than it ever has. It has not been that long ago when the grass there was so high, you could not see over it. The lights?! So should all residents remove their SOLAR lights, too?! LG has lost many children in accidents. Memorials are out for them, even in Texas!!! I say that this Woman needs to worry about more serious things in the city!! Maybe we should just MOVE her for lack of better words!! My heart and prayers go out to the friends and family of this boy. YOU are doing the right thing, not the city!!!!

Posted by: ex-LG employee Location: oklahoma on Oct 10, 2008 at 05:23 PM
While i don't completely agree with concerned mother, you are absolutely right about the school "super". or anyone that works there. God forbid someone have to lift a finger to help another just because it's not their "job". It's been my experience with LG that most of these people , or society for that matter, thrive on controvery and sticking their noses where they don't belong. My heart goes out to zach's family and friends.

Posted by: DEVOTED PARENT Location: LONE GROVE on Oct 10, 2008 at 05:22 PM
I AM GUESSING THAT A LOT OF YOU THAT ARE CALLING THIS JUNK AND TRASH HAVE NOT SEEN THE MEMORIAL OTHER THAN ON THE TV OR IN THE NEWSPAPER. WELL TAKE A DRIVE, LOOK AT, GET OUT AND READ WHAT THE CHILDREN HAVE WROTE. YOU WILL SEE ZACH'S SKATEBOARD, WHICH HE LOVED, YOU WILL SEE FOOTBALLS, WHICH HE TOSSED WITH IS BEST FREINDS AND LOVED PLAYING THE GAME, SINCE HE WAS ON THE SCHOOL TEAM, YOU WILL SEE BANDANAS. THIS WAS ZACH'S SIGN, EVERY COLOR OF BANDANA REPRESENTED A COUNTRY, THAT HE WAS PRAYING FOR. YOU WILL SEE AND FEEL THE LOVE. I PROMISE YOU IF YOU WALK AROUND THE MEMORIAL YOU WILL FEEL ZACH THERE, HE IS WATCHING OVER ALL OF US AND HIS IS PRAYING FOR YOU! IF THIS IS WHAT YOU CALL TRASH AND JUNK - THEN YOU BETTER GET TO A CHURCH OR START PRAYING FOR YOURSELF. I CAN'T BEGIN TO TELL YOU HOW MANY KIDS LIVES HAVE BEEN CHANGED BECAUSE OF THIS AND BECAUSE OF ZACH. ZACH WANTED EVERYBODY TO KNOW GOD AND HIS LOVE AND FORGIVENESS.

Posted by: LongHorn Location: Denison TX on Oct 10, 2008 at 05:16 PM
When we honestly ask ourselves which person in our lives means the most to us, we often find that it is those who, instead of giving much advice, solutions, or cures, have chosen rather to share our pain and touch our wounds with a gentle and tender hand. The friend who can be silent with us in a moment of despair or confusion, who can stay with us in an hour of grief and pain, who can tolerate not knowing, not curing, not healing and face with us the reality of our loss, that is a friend who cares. Time heals all wounds Let the memorial stay

Posted by: 2007 grad Location: Madill on Oct 10, 2008 at 04:56 PM
I graduated from Madill last year and we lost someone last June which he was only 17 and did not get to make his senior year. This was the most painful feelin any of us have ever felt knowing he was way to young to leave this world. It is not fair to mess with Zach's memorial. I know if they ever did that in madill there would some serious problems. I think they should leave it alone and have respect for Zach and stop being so self absorbed.

Posted by: Prayerful Location: Oklahoma on Oct 10, 2008 at 04:49 PM
This sight is not a place to remember that terrible night, but is still where an unfortunate event occurred. No one touched by Zach could ever drive by this 4 way stop and not have some pain knowing what happened at that spot. However, no one is memorializing the accident, this is a wonderful way to make that intersection a little easier to bear on a daily commute. Friends and family can not help but remember what happened there but, now you see love when you look at the memorial. It is back from the road, it is tasteful, it is well kept. That particular spot has never looked better in the 16 years I have driven past Meridian and Prarie Valley. It is my hope and my belief that this can be concluded in a mutually beneficial way. I understand the city's point of view, I really do, but I feel as long as this stays maintained, let it stay. Zach's memory is not at this site, he's in the hearts of this community and will be loved and remembered for a long time.

Posted by: Anonymous on Oct 10, 2008 at 04:33 PM
Oh no Karyn we cant have that. That would make sense. Great point.

Posted by: concerned mother on Oct 10, 2008 at 04:23 PM
This has gone beyond the childrens way to grieve. Why be concerned with the site where this young mans life was lost and find a place in the school such as the commons or a nice tree planted in memory to grow and serve as a positive act on behalf of such a beloved child. The real story here may be that the LG Superintendent has refused to let the commons actually be used for the students ,someone might actually have to clean up the cement where the tree may leave debree.The students need to come together and create one solid idea as a memorial and realize that inevetability the city will face a law suit reguarding the site if another accident should occur.There are other students this school system has lost and feel they deserve a spot at the school for memorials also. God forbid any other young lives are lost.The school needs to recognize the need.His parents arent even being allowed to grieve due to everyone having their own agendas.God bless each of you kids.

Posted by: Natalie Smith Location: LG. on Oct 10, 2008 at 04:14 PM
I Think That This Memorial Is Something We Can Remember Zachery By, It's The Only Thing We Have Left To Remember Him By. All The Students Of Lone Grove Want This Memorial To Stand, And So Do Many Parents. And Have You Had One Of Your Friends Die Age 15? If You Have, You KNOW How It Feels. & By The Way, It's Not Trash. We (The Students) Including Myself, Helped Make This Memorial And I Would Be Crushed If They Took It Down. All We Ask Of LG, Is Keep This Memorial Up. Please Attend The LG City Meeting On October 20.

Posted by: parent Location: pottsboro on Oct 10, 2008 at 04:05 PM
from what i can see in the above picture, the memorial is very nice. and as long as the kids are taking care if it, it should remain there. i would be honored as a parent (if i had lost my child) if his classmate thought enough of him to take the time and do something so sweet. let the kids have there time to heal. zach sounds like he was a great kid and is missed by so many! as far as a distraction, we have distractions everywhere. how many times do you catch yourself looking at something on the side of the rode or at a billboard sign, why is this any different. and it's not sick to remember someone, everyone heals in their own way and if this helps the kids, let it be, they aren't asking the city to keep it clean and mowed, sounds like they are handling that one their own. if they stop and the city had to step in and take care of it, then at that point the city would have the right to take it down.

Posted by: Karyn Location: Kingston on Oct 10, 2008 at 03:43 PM
Rather than buying all this "stuff" that will be rained on, sun-faded and ruined in a few short weeks get a nice marble/granite bench for the high school yard, a picnic table, plant a tree, get a plaque for the gym, something that will last. A small white cross in the area of the accident could remind others to be careful in that area.

Posted by: Concerned Citizen Location: LG on Oct 10, 2008 at 03:42 PM
VOTE HER OUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Posted by: Anonymous on Oct 10, 2008 at 03:10 PM
I think a lot of these people would think differently if it were their child that was being memorialized...Some of the comments on here are just heartless. Hopefully, they never have to know how it feels to lose a child.

Posted by: Concerned citizen Location: Lone Grove area on Oct 10, 2008 at 02:56 PM
First of all memorials to the dead even where they died should be left alone. Are we to tear down the memorial to President Kennedy in Dallas at the spot where he died? Lincoln died at the theatre in Washington Dc and the theatre box has been memorialized as the spot where he was shot and across the street the boarding house is a memorial of where he died.These memorials are no different than the one in Lone Grove, a place for rememberance and healing . The City manager is totally wrong in this and I wouldnt be surprised if she doesnt have her position for very long. If she felt so strongly about this to make it an issue then why wont she talk on camera about it? Its because she is thinking oops I opened pandora's box on this one. Voters will remember when re-election time comes.

Posted by: tanner patton Location: Lone Grove High School on Oct 10, 2008 at 02:21 PM
If people think it is a distraction then they dont have to look i mean nobody is makeing them look at it, its optional and the mayor isd just being a cold heartless woman how is not going to mayor much longer

Posted by: Mythoughts Location: Ardmore on Oct 10, 2008 at 02:18 PM
Some of you have no heart. I can't believe what some of you are saying. This was somebodies baby. I personally agree that the site never looked better till these kids took it over. This is a display of compassion that so many have lost sight of these days. I vote leave it there. If you are woried about it blowing around, tent stakes would work nicely to secure the items. I also agree the city manager has bigger problems to concern herself with.

Posted by: Student. Location: Lone Grove on Oct 10, 2008 at 02:16 PM
Rand Mcnally, Take a walk in our shoes and realize what we are going thru. We are honoring his life by placing memories at the site. This affects you in no way what so ever. So BACKK OFF! This is a way for us to heal. IT IS NOT IN ANY WAY TRASH. I THINK YOUR TRASH FOR EVEN SAYING THAT OUR MEMORIES ARE TRASH. IF YOU HAVE SEEN THIS MEMORIAL YOU WOULD KNOW THAT IT IS NOT JUNK. SO LEAVE US ALONE AND LET US DEAL WITH OUR EMOTIONS FOR CRYING OUT LOUD!

Posted by: Dylan Pletcher Location: Lone Grove High School on Oct 10, 2008 at 02:08 PM
I do not think that the memorial is trash. We put the memorial up to remember Zach for for what a great friend he was to everyone. people who think this is trash should try losing a best friend and see how they would feel about it. it is not very good. The students at Lone Grove all loved Zach and would love to have his memorial there forever. I do not see how people say this is a ditraction when it is at a stop sign. people are supposed to stop and shouldnt be going fast enough to be distracted. WE ALL LOVE ZACH AND WOULD LOVE TO HAVE HIS MEMORIAL HERE. i also do not see why they would be complaning about not being able to mow when they have all kinds of other spots not mowed and they only complain about it. there should be no reason for LOne GRove to take this down.

Posted by: Student. again. Location: Lone Grove. on Oct 10, 2008 at 02:03 PM
The memorial is not trash in any way. it started as a single cross and each day something new appeared from his fellow classmates and friends. I think the city of Lone Grove needs to chill out and give us time. If we have to take our memorial down then no one else should be able to have theirs. The garage sale signs, political signs, and other memorials should be taken down. Every student at Lone Grove was affected by Zach in some way. We still think about it everyday. and when we see it it actually makes us feel better. It does the same to Zach's family. So on behalf of Zach's friends, the city of Lone Grove needs to back out and let us live our life. They have bigger things to worry about. We will NOT back down.

Posted by: Student Location: Lone Grove on Oct 10, 2008 at 01:58 PM
I am a student at Lone Grove. I was affected by Zach's death. ALL the kids want the memorial there because it means more to us. And Zach's family likes it there because it reminds them how loved Zach was and how many lives he touched. We dont want the memorial moved. and we DONT want it at the cemetary because a lot of kids dont like going to cemetarys in general. the memorial is not a distraction. Its a way stop for crying out loud. if the car is not already stopped or going slow then our city has bigger problems with people running stop signs. and why does the city suddenly care about mowing the grass? they havent mowed the grass in FOREVER! the day after Zach died we went to the memorial and the grass was up to our knees. what is so wrong with children trying to mourn? ABSOLUTELY NOTHING! I think the city manager is just a COLD HEARTLESS woman for not caring about how anyone feels.I think she needs to take a walk in our shoes and realize what we have went thru. And it is NOT trash!

Posted by: already been outraged once Location: Lone Grove!!! on Oct 10, 2008 at 01:40 PM
Can the parents of these children and the children themselves not have a meeting and see what can be done about this situatuion??? I know afew outraged citizens in Lone Grove that have had enough of the city manager in the past that would stand behind these families too! Get in touch with some of them and I am sure they will show their support!!! I promise you it was her decision to take down the memorial, she is ruthless and likes drama!!!!

Posted by: John Location: Durant on Oct 10, 2008 at 01:39 PM
I feel bad for everyone that was hurt by the loss of this person. However, the side of the road is not where memorials are supposed to be set up. Thats the reason we have cemeteries. Take the stuff and put it up at his cemetery site if you think it helps you grieve to put stuffed animals and lights in the ground.

Posted by: Anonymous on Oct 10, 2008 at 12:47 PM
I think it's just peoples' way of getting attention through someone else. I hate how it is when someone dies in some tragic way (especially a young person), all sorts of people come out of the woodwork and claim to be that person's best friend. More often than not I bet they barely knew the person!!

Posted by: person on Oct 10, 2008 at 12:45 PM
Like it has been said so many times before, how is this memorial any more distracting than the countless political signs we see at EVERY intersection? It's not. Think on the reality page. 'Trash', as some have called it, from the memorial will not 'blow all over town'. The memorial is well cared for. And to those of you who say the memorial is sick, who are you to judge? If that's how the kids want to remember him, then let them. It's sickening to know that once again people are using this poor kid's death as an excuse to stir up controversy. Have people really sunken that low? I agree with to's post. The City of Lone Grove should allow people to adopt the area. If they don't, and carry on with tearing down the memorial that the kids (and some parents) have worked so diligently on, I will remember the Shameful decision made by the City of Lone Grove as long as I remember Zach. Forever.

Posted by: CULTURED Location: NOT LONE GROVE on Oct 10, 2008 at 12:41 PM
So very Southern White Trashy

Posted by: cg Location: lone grove on Oct 10, 2008 at 12:28 PM
I think that this Marianne Elfert has bigger fish that need frying!!!! Stop the speeders in the school zone on Hwy 70; clean up the areas of town where there is trash and junk cars all over a lot; get the roads fixed so folks don't tear up their cars; etc. I say, as long as the kids keep the area neat (which they have), leave them alone - it will all settle down as time goes by and they have had time to grieve. Apparently, this Marianne knows she's wrong since she REFUSED to make a statement on camera!!!!

Posted by: jodye james Location: ardmore on Oct 10, 2008 at 12:24 PM
my greatgrandson, Dylan Pletcher was Zack's best friend and was so devastated by the boy's passing. I see absolutely now reason to dismantle the memorial. I even provided the solar lights and the group maintains the small plot. The city of Lone Grove should just quietly "back out" of this controversary and time will take care of the vital importance of this "problem."

Posted by: Grandma Location: Lone Grove, Ok. on Oct 10, 2008 at 12:22 PM
I think the City Manager needs to be concerned about more important things. Let the parents and the friends have their memorial as long as they keep it neat and well kept.

Posted by: to Location: Lone Grove on Oct 10, 2008 at 12:19 PM
It is the students who have maintained that area and kept it looking so nice. They are the ones keeping the "trash" from blowing. Anyone who lives in Lone Grove knows that this area used to be an overgrown, trash covered area. That's the hazard. Now, It's the best looking area in the town. Couldn't we "adopt" the area? I drive by the memorial everyday and have never witnessed an obstruction to the road. Not people, not cars, not trash...It is no more distracting that the countless political and garage sale signs all over. Those signs will be there long past their dates, littering our roadways. The highway right-of-ways are trash covered messes. That is what visitors to our town see. And to infer that the family and friends grieving should be concluded is so heartless. I am concerned about the negativity that has pervaded our community of late.

Posted by: Anonymous on Oct 10, 2008 at 11:41 AM
Why would people want to remember him where he was painfully killed. I also think this is a little sick.

Posted by: My Opinion Location: marietta on Oct 10, 2008 at 11:38 AM
I understand that someone has lost their life and these people want to place something at a memorial site. There is no problem with that. But I have to agree he might have been in the accident at one place but his remains are in the cemetary and that is where they should go to leave their memories. But just like the city workers, the cemetary workers don't want to have to pick up alot of stuff that is blowing around the cemetary or making it harder to mow around the graves.

Posted by: Anonymous on Oct 10, 2008 at 11:36 AM
I agree with Rand McNally (the first post) If they want to bring these things and remember him why don't they do it at his grave?

Posted by: MOM Location: LONE GORVE on Oct 10, 2008 at 10:44 AM
It's funny how they want to take down this memorial but yet peoples grass can be over the roof of their house and nothing be done about it(oh wait he works for the city go figure) or when the grass is so tall in the park and the only time it is momed is when there is going to be something going on....The mayor is a disgrace and if we all stood behind one another something could be done about it. *stepping off her soap box*

Posted by: Caring Mom Location: Grayson on Oct 10, 2008 at 10:39 AM
From what I can see of the video, it doesn't appear too close to the road. And for crying out loud, you don't HAVE to look at it if you don't want to. Yes, the gravesite is appropriate to mourn. But, the roadside memorials are a reminder to ALL who are passing by that someone lost their life there at that spot. Everytime I see one, it reminds me to watch out and be careful. It's also a point I make to my sone whose 16 and about to get his license. My vote..........LEAVE IT ALONE! I bet if you asked the kids, they would mow around it. Looks very kept and tasteful to me.

Posted by: Fozzy Location: Ardmore on Oct 10, 2008 at 10:17 AM
The city needs to prepare a place in the city park or somewhere other than the side of the road for a memorial. These kids are also going to have to learn that as sad as it is, death is a part of everyone's life and that like one of the posters stated, remember the kids path in life.. not his place of death.

Posted by: Anonymous on Oct 10, 2008 at 10:10 AM
the speelingg her iz amazin

Posted by: I'm sorry Location: Not there on Oct 10, 2008 at 09:57 AM
I'm sorry, but I agree with the city. They are not trying to take down the Cross, but simply take care of the city. When weather blows in and all the little items are blown all over town, people will complain about the city not cleaning up. I have been is this same situation several times and I do feel for these kids. I've lost SERVERAL friends over the years and I'm still in my 20s. If someone is visitng this spot daily to pray, then they need to find a church or go to a counseling center. I sooooo sorry for the family, but the world around them does not stop.

Posted by: Anonymous on Oct 10, 2008 at 09:55 AM
AMEN RAND!!

Posted by: Concerned Location: Ardmore on Oct 10, 2008 at 09:38 AM
It makes me physically ill to think that the city would want this taken down. The site is in very good taste and is a place of comfort for many of the students/adults grieving the loss of such a wonderful young man. This site is better kept now than if it were in the cities care. Shame on you city of Lone Grove for wanting to destroy such a wonderful memorial!!!

Posted by: Me Location: Sherman on Oct 10, 2008 at 09:36 AM
This is rediculas. Let these kids greeve the way that they want to. We see memorial sites all over everywhere and no one ever says a word about it. They are not a distraction, just a reminder.

Posted by: Zach's Memorial Location: Just my own opinion on Oct 10, 2008 at 09:33 AM
If it is a potential distraction that could cause another wreck, I agree it should be kept simply as a memorial cross. Just understand, the psychological effect, however, for parents who lose a child is very very devastating and also frustrating in that they find out something they never knew before...there is no such thing as mourning "correctly." When faced with something this overpowering...this kind of grief...it can cause the sanest person to do things others don't understand and some may even perceive them as "odd" but that's only because people who have not lost a child don't know what it feels like. It's the unthinkable and what (any normal parent) fears. I feel sorry for this family. And I'm sure the friends of this boy are upset. But, this is how they are expressing their concern and love for Zach, who I am sure appreciates it. At the same time, Zach would not want this to unintentionally harm someone in the process. God bless you. God bless Zach too. Been there.

Posted by: ThatFigures Location: Carter County on Oct 10, 2008 at 09:06 AM
The city manager in Lone Grove is an idiot. Come on citizens grow a set and get rid of her now. The kids need this memorial to help them heal.

Posted by: Get rid of it. Location: Local on Oct 10, 2008 at 08:58 AM
Roadside memorials are ridiculous! That is what cemeteries are for. The location of a death means nothing. It's nothing more than a distraction to drivers.

Posted by: Brandy Dixon Location: Lone Grove Oklahoma on Oct 10, 2008 at 08:33 AM
My heart goes out to the family and friends of Zach, I can't imagine the pain that the family is going threw. I can see how the memorial could be a distraction, and maybe potenialy dangerous for drivers who pass by, but I think if we are going to make the family remove there memorial because it is a distaction, I think the signs that are put up for canidates should be also removed. There are many large signs in high traffic areas for the 08 canidates running for various offices, and garage sale signs each week, that are distracting as well. So I think that if we are going to put guidelines up on the memorial, I think we should address the other issues as well.

Posted by: sherman Location: sherman on Oct 10, 2008 at 08:23 AM
My prayers go out to the family. My heart breaks for you all, but a small cross is enough for any site. The grave is where it all belongs. Only a small cross needs to be on the accident spot because it does cause a distraction.

Posted by: Anonymous on Oct 10, 2008 at 08:13 AM
I feel for familys of accident victums, but those homemade memorials are a distraction and probably a pain for anyone that has to mow around them. Remember your loved one in life, not where they died.

Posted by: Brandi Location: Durant on Oct 10, 2008 at 07:53 AM
I think it is sad that the city is making such a big fuss over a memorial. These people lost a child and a friend. It is not as if they are building a statue to block the vision of the traffic.

Posted by: Anonymous on Oct 10, 2008 at 07:47 AM
I don't find it to be a distraction. I drove by the other day. It's at the stop where cars stop. You can look at it then. It's very pretty. You might as well take every other cross and flowers and whatever down along all the roads if your gonna take this down. Even if you just leave certain things. Whats the harm in the rest of the stuff?

Posted by: me Location: oklahoma on Oct 10, 2008 at 07:46 AM
I believe it is the state law I know they have removed some on major highways because of it.

Posted by: RC Location: Texas on Oct 10, 2008 at 07:20 AM
She sounds like a cranky old woman. Let the kids have their memorial, it's how they are showing their appreciation. She must remember these kids are probably eligible to vote or soon will be. Way to go Lone Grove, show your support and respect for your friend.

Posted by: Mom Location: OK on Oct 10, 2008 at 07:00 AM
May I suggest that another, less dangerous, spot be designated for a temporary memorial. This would give the kids and family a place to leave things, and stop and think.

Posted by: To Marianne Location: Thankfully a Texan on Oct 10, 2008 at 06:45 AM
Dear Marianne:Although this may be "City Property", you might need to remember you work for the "City" and the "City" is paid by the taxes of those that live there. So,albeit city property,try remembering there was a young man who lost his life there and we all need a place to reflect,pray and grieve.Be mindful of that when you start jerking things off of "city property". Maybe if you had lost someone,you would have a different perspective. Maybe a compromise would be wise-and a kind gesture.My prayers to the family and my apologies for those unfeeling "city" folks.

Posted by: mommy Location: oklahoma on Oct 10, 2008 at 05:59 AM
this is completely ridiculous. there is no since in the city being selfish like that. this is a place for these kids to see their friends final place on earth. how is it such a distraction? if that is the case the distracted person needs to go back to take their driving test again. GOD BLESS THE FAMILY AND FRIENDS OF THIS YOUNG MAN.. MY PRAYERS ARE WITH YOU.....

Posted by: J Location: carter county on Oct 9, 2008 at 11:20 PM
whoa dang, miss elfert is doing something that might get her ran out of town...

Posted by: Rand McNally Location: Durant on Oct 9, 2008 at 10:46 PM
People who choose to memorialize anyone by placing junk at the site of their death are mentally disturbed. If they truly loved this person, they would celebrate his life, not his death. Name a building or field after him, create a scholarship, start a charity, in other words do something positive that remembers who he was. The people leaving their garbage along roadways should be charged with littering.

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